Is It Ever Possible for the Role of a Man to be Obsolete?

I saw a segment on the Today Show about the ‘trend’ of Hollywood women deciding to have babies before (or in the absence of) being married.  According to the Today Show, more than 40% of children in the United States are born to a single parent household.  So clearly this isn’t just a Hollywood trend; it’s actually quite common to see women in their late ‘30s and early ‘40s making a conscious decision to have a child without having a husband.  But what made me chuckle was the implication that perhaps these women are making the role of a man obsolete in their lives.  Ha!  As if!

The role of a man could never be obsolete.  As a single mother myself, I certainly understand how one could fall into the trap of thinking that with a few extra dollars, a good support system, and some adjustments to the work schedule the difficulties of not having anyone to share the load of childcare, discipline, and financial obligations with could be made rather doable for most women.  But anyone who’s ever witnessed a child look like a deer caught in the headlights when a man says, “Hey, what’s up” in that boisterous way that men have.  I’ll bet you that child doesn’t get exposed to many men.  Anyone who’s watched a child disintegrate into tears when a man gives them a playful punch or tosses them in the air with the gentle roughness that men have.  I’ll bet that child doesn’t get exposed to many men.   Anyone who’s witnessed how some teenage boys (over)reactively resort to using weapons to compensate for their lack of confidence when someone bruises their ego; I’ll bet that boy didn’t get exposed to many men as a child.  Any woman who’s been the victim of a swearing tirade because they rejected a man’s advances; I’ll bet that man didn’t get exposed to many men as a child.  I think you get the picture — It’s the men in our society who teach us how to take risks, command respect, be playful, and grow a thicker skin.  There’s so much more that a man brings to the table than money, an extra pair of hands, and sperm.

by : V.Fuller


~ by livefromheadqcourterz on January 28, 2011.

5 Responses to “Is It Ever Possible for the Role of a Man to be Obsolete?”


  2. First of all, let me say that I enjoyed this post cause it presents another chance for discussion. Discussion is good and during said discussions I sometimes get so passionate that Im all over the place…please forgive me. Having said that I will also say that I agree that there is so much more that a man brings to the table than money, an extra pair of hands, and sperm. The two words that jumped out at me in this post were MAN and EXPOSURE; having successfully raised three sons myself, I know first hand the importance of exposing children to people who are positive role models. Lots of things that my sons learned did not come from me or their father. But consider this…what if we had not divorced…what if he had gotten hit my a mac truck six years in…my job would have been the same…put them in a position to get good man training from somewhere…so….men obsolete?…never!…and for the most base reason…I like a man who makes me smile…and if Im smiling so are my children.

  3. Imagine if you add God into your life. You might have this crazy thing called morals and values that you put first. Then this other crazy thing might happen like not sleeping with whoever you feel like sleeping with just because it feels good. You might also choose the person you marry a little better because you value a marriage and don’t consider divorce just a thing Americans do because it’s normal. The main reason this didn’t happen as much earlier in history is because people use to have American values and God in their life. Now people value who is the sexiest Hollywood star and who has the most expensive toys. It’s probably also the reason morals and God were left out of this article because they don’t cross your mind as important either. But as long as people are keeping it real in the club with their glass of Henny issues like this will continue to be something to laugh about. Maybe Obama will solve it by getting the Government involved but he is still trying to find a Church to attend also.

    • Every slave master believed in god…most were married and had children…yet almost to a man they went outside their marital vows and sired children with their female slaves….then went to church on sunday and praised him…majority of people who are as you say keeping it real in the club with their glass of Henny are believers….God doesn’t reside in CHURCH…Church is a building where like worshiping believers go to communally worship… American isnt the only country on the planet nor did it invent morals or values….. Your holier than thou diatribe is appreciated …thanks for expressing on the blog… also remember this…. When you understand why you REJECT ALL OTHER GODS BUT THE ONE YOU WORSHIP…. then you will UNDERSTAND WHY OTHERS WHO BELIEVE DIFFERENTLY REJECT YOURS

    • Bowse, you make a lot of erroneous assumptions in your response. The main one is that someone with morals, values, and a reverence for God would not be in the position of single parenthood. Regardless of which religion you identify with, no one in the history of humankind has ever lived up to that theory of righteousness. Taking a holier than thou stance fails to address the question of whether it’s time for society to begin viewing a man’s worth as more than the money, protection, and sex he provides.

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