Reflections External

As much as I’d like to, I’m not going to lie to you here. I have a
weakness for Hollywood gossip. I know…it’s very un-revolutionary of
me. It’s the equivalent to hydrogenated palm oil and high fructose
corn syrup. Yes, yes…It is all things bad and wrong with our society
today…It’s distracting us from the real battle at hand. And yet —
in those moments where shit is just too real and I can’t stomach
hearing any more about world affairs and politricks, a little
Hollywood gossip goes a long way. It’s entertainment. And sometimes
distractions are necessary.

And so it was like this that I happened upon a little blurb about the
great Dame Elizabeth Taylor getting engaged. If the ‘reports’ are
true, and it actually goes down, this will make it her ninth time
getting married. Nine! Really though?! For some reason I find that to
be absolutely unbelievable. I won’t pretend that the particulars of
her life, or details of this engagement are all that interesting to
me. However, what is interesting is the fact that someone would
actually get married this many times. Come on! Even Halle knows
better. I’m not saying I’m anti-marriage, but I guess I’ve never
believed that ‘love’ had much to do with marriage. Marriage is the
legality of love. It’s a business merger between two people, who
presumably (or hopefully) love one another. The rest is just the fat
around the meat.

That ring and those vows and fancy white dress don’t stop people from
falling out of love, cheating, or eventually leaving. I think deep
down inside, everybody knows that — most just don’t care or think it
won’t happen to them. I won’t bore you with the statistics — mostly
because they were confusing and I got annoyed trying to find updated
ones that included all the states. Regardless, all I know is, the rude
awakening from that false sense of ownership is a bitch. A very costly
and stressful bitch. Just ask the homie, Nas. He can probably tell you
plenty about costly and stressful bitches. Yes indeed, divorce is
unpleasant no matter who you are…but add a little paper and fame to
the mix, and watch that fire burn! (See the Tiger Woods story, the
Sandra Bullock story, the Mel Gibson story, the Paul McCartney story,
etc. etc. etc. I told you…gossip weakness)

Sure, I believe in love. I believe in companionship. I believe in
growing old together, and all that shit. But I also believe that
marriage isn’t for everyone. I know honesty is one of those
double-edged swords and all that, but it could save people a lot of
money in divorce fees. For example, if you’ve cheated on every single
girlfriend you’ve ever had, then marriage probably isn’t for you. If
you tried it eight times before, there’s a good chance that nine won’t
be the magic number. If your husband is a tatted-up Nazi, then there’s
a high  likelihood that he’s busy making Nazi porn with other
tatted-up freaks…and when the shit hits the fan, it really won’t be
a good look that you had no fucking clue…and some might even wonder
if you aren’t some kind of a white supremacist-loving German. I’m just
saying…

But if you are lucky enough to have found someone you love and
respect, then the best thing you can do for them (and yourself) is to
be honest and treat the relationship as if it were sacred. And also,
it doesn’t hurt to remember these two cardinal rules:
1. You can’t turn a whore into a house wife.
2. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

Ancient words of wisdom.

by : third rail

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~ by livefromheadqcourterz on April 14, 2010.

4 Responses to “Reflections External”

  1. Love your perspective on marriage, but ummm, clearing my throat about #1! LOL I’m just saying!

  2. Thank you, Mrs. Bell. As for #1…I guess never say never?! Stranger things have happened before I suppose! lol

  3. Maybe number 9 is meant to keep her from dying alone — after all, the great dame’s no spring chicken…

  4. True!!

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